1. The next time my phone rings it’s President Obama telling me there’s a really important mission that only I can be trusted with. “Do you trust me?” he asks. “Run.” Suddenly a SWAT team bursts through the office window and like Neo, I Matrix through that glass like it’s slow-moving snow. I steal someone’s motorcycle and drive across the border, finally making it the White House by nightfall, where Obama gives me a special mission. That’s as far as I’ve gotten with this one.
2. Tonight when I’m trying to sleep a team of flying childhood heroes will tap on my window and tell me I too, can fly. Sailor Moon inducts me as the newest member of her planetary circle after NASA discovers a new planet called Cosmra II.
3. I’m in the washroom peeing (sorry TMI) when I notice a change. The water is so subtly rippling that only that Princess who felt the pea under her mattress would notice. I run out of the office and gaze up at angry clouds—the apocalypse has hit and we’re all on our own. How would I fare? I make my way out of city and join a band of rebels much like those in the Walking Dead. We live of the land and I become that kickass girl who looks awesome sans modern hygiene and wields a gun with the guys.
4. The future. When we all have hoover purses that float beside us so our shoulder don’t ache from carrying them to work and can fit a shitload of stuff inside it like Mary Poppins.
5. Whether I would choose the power of teleporting or going back in time. Clearly I would choose teleportation but couldn’t I technically get both powers if I choose to go back in time? I mean I could be like “I want to go to Paris two minutes ago.” I’m technically still teleporting… but then I’d cheat and get two powers. Tell me, am I wrong?
6. Making it super all time big and going back to any high school bullies—I’m talking to you Jason Arnold, who pushed me in mud when I was five.
7. Cruising a sailboat in Greece with a spritzer in my right hand and a magazine in the left. There’s upbeat music playing and tonight, we (my beautiful non existent husband and I) are getting seafood.
8. Pulling a Jerry Maguire and breaking out on my own. But I’d have to steal the office dog since we have no goldfish and he can be a bit snappy.
9. Getting picked up by Doctor Who for an evening and exploring the universe and then getting dropped off at Planet Z, a marvelous tropical paradise in the universe over from here.
10. Being Kate Middleton… or actually maybe Pippa so I can kinda be in the spotlight but tear myself away if I wanted.